I am having problems connecting to other gamers when playing online
I have put the ea games site in my safe sites but am still having problems
i am on a wireless network and am not the controlling computer and i am runing through a d-link router does the main computer have to be set to accept the site or does the router have a firewall and how do i set it or is there an over ride????

The main computer has no control over your wirelessly connected one, it doesn't even need to be switched on for the wireless one to work so it's wrong to say the main one is "the controlling computer". They can go online independent of each other (provided the network is set up properly).

Most routers do have a built in firewall (mine has, a SpeedTouch), but you should be able to disable it by running the browser-based configuration software you should have been given with the router.
Any software firewall on the main computer has no effect on the laptop whatsoever, even when the main computer is running.