Memo to all students:

In order to assure the highest levels of quality
work and productivity from students, it will be
our policy to keep all students well taught through
our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY
TEACHING (S.H.I.T. ). We are trying to give our
students more S.H.I.T. than any other school. If you
feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T.
on the course,please see your lecturer. You will be
immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T. list,
and our lecturer are especially skilled at seeing that
youget all the S.H.I.T. you can handle.

Students who don't know S.H.I.T. will be placed in
DEPARTMENTAL EDUCATIONAL EVALUATION
PROGRAMS ( D.E.E.P S.H.I.T. ). Those who fail to
take D.E.E.P S.H.I.T. seriously will have to go to
EDUCATIONAL ATTITUDE TRAINING
( E.A.T. S.H.I.T. ).
Since our lecturers took S.H.I.T. before they
graduated, they don't have to do S.H.I.T. anymore,
as they are all full of S.H.I.T. already.

If you are full of S.H.I.T., you may be interested


in a job teaching others. We can add your name
to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LECTURE LIST
( B.U.L.L. S.H.I.T. ). For students who are intending
to pursue a career in management and consultancy, we
will refer you to the department of MANAGERIAL
OPERATIONAL RESEARCH EDUCATIONAL
( M.O.R.E. S.H.I.T.).
This course emphasizes on how to manage
M.O.R.E S.H.I.T.If you have further questions, please
direct them to our HEAD OF TEACHING SPECIAL HIGH
INTENSITY TRAINING ( H.O.T.S.H.I.T. )

Thank you, BOSS IN GENERAL SPECIAL HIGH
INTENSITY TEACHING ( B.I.G S.H.I.T. )
Cat